The Scene: The passenger compartment of Air Canada Flight 284 as the airplane approaches London.
Dis-embodied Voice : Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. This is your Captain speaking. We are just about 20 miles from Heathrow Airport where the weather is fine and although there has been a good deal of snow, we are told it should present no problems to our landing. Unfortunately, because of the backup caused by the weather Air Traffic Control has informed me that they have no gate available. We are therefore being directed to go into a holding pattern over Windsor until we run out of fuel when we shall plunge into the icy waters of the North Sea. First Class and Executive Class passengers will then be led by our trained cabin staff to their heated life rafts which will be by the First Class exit. The rest of you are just going to have to swim for it. I would like to take this opportunity of thanking you for flying Air Canada today and hope we shall see you again soon. Hahahahahaha!
Well, okay, I made the last bit up but it is a fact that after a nine and one half hour flight from Vancouver, we did circle over London for about 30 minutes before landing and then spent a further one hour and ten minutes sitting on the tarmac while the ground crew managed to get the air bridge working sufficiently to enable us to de-plane. My brother, bless him, was there to meet me and we drove north to Ipswich, a distance of about110 miles, through snow-covered landscape and pretty gnarly weather to Ipswich in Suffolk, my final destination and where I am to spend nine days. And the reason for this trip: I am here to help celebrate the birth of she without whom there would be no Operaman. My mother is 91 today!